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You Asked for Feedback, and You Got It - How to Handle It

8/3/2019

2 Comments

 
Picture
Perhaps you asked a member of a professional writers’ group for feedback about your book or short story. Perhaps it came back slightly sharp, slightly critical, and you think the reader missed the point.
 
Authors are thin-skinned. We offer friends and family (or even casual acquaintances) our work to read, full of expectations that they will enjoy it and think it is stellar.
 
Then we get their assessment back, and it isn’t what we thought we would hear. Perhaps the reader noticed those info dumps we thought wouldn’t matter.
 
Or perhaps they know more about horses (or medicine, or police procedure) than we do and suggest we need to do more research and then rewrite what we thought was the perfect novel.
 
We bleed profusely when a first reader points out places where our work isn’t perfect. For some authors, even mild comments feel like their work has been torn to shreds.
 
A good, honest critique can hurt if you are only expecting to hear about the brilliance of your work. Even if it is worded kindly, criticism can make you feel like you have failed. 
 
Even people who have spent years in the business have been known to go ballistic and make an uncomfortable situation worse.
 
But what if it was our favorite work, the best thing we ever wrote? Why couldn’t the reader see that?
 
When I first began this journey, I received feedback that was the opposite of what I expected. I managed to stay polite and tried to listen to what they were actually saying. I knew I had to use their comments to improve my work, but I didn’t know where to begin.
 
Feeling confused, being the only one who doesn’t understand something evokes anger in me. Still, as a former hockey player, I knew that skill and growth could only come through education, practice, and effort. I knew I had to take their comments like a grownup and learn from the experience.
 
Critiques hurt in those days, but when I look back on my earlier work, I can clearly see why it was not acceptable in the state it was in.
 
  1. I had no idea what a finished manuscript should look like.
  2. Nor did I understand how to get it to look that way.
  3. I didn't understand how to write to a particular theme.
  4. I didn’t understand how to punctuate written dialogue.
  5. I resented being told I used clichés.
  6. I disliked being told my prose was passive. But I couldn’t understand what they meant when they said to write active prose.
  7. I went out and bought books on the craft of writing, and I am still buying books on the craft today. I will never stop learning and improving.
 
Not understanding how to correct what has been pointed out as bad writing habits is the core of why we feel so hurt.
 
You need to be strong, stay calm, and understand that the reader has gone to some trouble for you. Please, don’t go off hurt, bad-mouthing that reader to your friends on your favorite writers’ forums.
 
Something you might want to consider—if they are an author, they may be involved with the same forums in all the many social platforms you are, so have a care what you say online. They’re just like the rest of us. If they have been around for any length of time in the industry, it’s likely they’ve experienced their share of criticism.
 
If you respond publicly in an unprofessional way, the innocent bystanders will remember you and won’t be inclined to work with you either. By now, we should all be aware that how we interact online with others is public information and is visible to the world.
 
Never be less than gracious to a person who reads and critiques your work when you communicate with them. Sit back and consider the areas they find problematic and ask yourself what revisions would make your work better.
 
Don’t ask a fellow member of a professional writers’ forum to read your work unless you want advice that is honest. Even if they don’t “get” your work, they spent their precious time reading it, taking time from their own writing.
 
A piece of advice I like to give everyone is this: some people, even people you know well, are not cut out to be beta readers or readers at all. They shoot from the hip and take no prisoners. I would suggest you don’t expect gentle comments from these sorts of readers, and if you have offered your work to a person who falls into this category, don’t feel guilty for not asking them to read for you again. But once you have cooled down, look at their comments with a fresh eye and try to see why they made them.
 
Negative feedback is a necessary part of growth. Don’t have a tantrum and immediately respond with an angst-riddled rant.
 
This is where you have the chance to cross the invisible line between amateur and professional. Always take the high ground—if a beta reader or first reader has given you a harshly worded critique, respond with a simple “thank you for your time.”
 
Above all, keep writing.
 
 
            _______________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
Connie J. Jasperson is a published poet and the author of nine novels. Her work has appeared in numerous anthologies. A founding member of Myrddin Publishing Group, she can be found blogging regularly on both the craft of writing and art history at Life in the Realm of Fantasy.
 

2 Comments
Dianne link
8/4/2019 09:13:13 pm

Very good advice. Knowing that critique can be used to better our work is the best attitude we can take.

Reply
Maggie Lynch link
8/9/2019 03:59:57 pm

Great advice, Connie. Constructive criticism is helpful and deinitely a learning opportunity, but it doesn't hurt any less.

I do think that choosing the right people to provide feedback is key. Simply putting out the request and taking the first person who agrees is not the best practice. It may be that person doesn't read in your genre or understand the tropes. It may be that person doesn't know much more about writing than you do. Even if they read in your genre, they still may have expectations that don't fit what you write.

That is why I'm a huge believer in professional Developmental Editors. These are the editors that understand story at an elemental level. The good ones will also point out continuity errors, any overall craft errors (e.g, passive vs active voice or telling instead of showing) and on occasion suggest you look for word choices that are more powerful.

I see so many authors, particularly new authors, who believe that just getting the grammar and punctuation perfect is what is needed. Readers will forgive some minor grammar and punctuation errors. But they won't forgive a boring story or a story that doesn't make sense to them.

I can tell you that twenty books later, I still have to take time to absorb feedback from my developmental editor. It's not as painful as the first time I had a completed manuscript. Some books, she only has two or three places that need reworking or extra punch or description. Other books will be riddled with markings. I never know going into the editing process. Because when I finish a book it is always the worst thing I've ever written, in my mind. All I can think of is all the ways I didn't meet my expectations for the story. I can't be objective and, truth be told, I'm sick of it. I'm tired of writing and rewriting looking for a perfection that is impossible to achieve.

These days, the pain of the critique usually comes in self-flagellation. "I should have known that." or "I do that every time, every book, why can't I catch it?" Or "I knew that scene wasn't working, why couldn't I figure it out?" But in the end, I'm grateful to have had someone I trusted to receive the manuscript and be objective about it. I'm grateful that she understands my voice and doesn't mess with it. My current editor is now working on my seventh novel with her.

I know I've grown and I'm getting better. I can say that today because I'm relieved she has my novel now and I don't have to look at it. :) I know that I will grow some more after this one too.

Reply



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    Contributor:
    Connie J Jasperson

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  • HOME
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      • Membership Application
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  • BOOKS
    • 2021 NEW RELEASES
    • NIWA SEAL OF QUALITY AWARDED BOOKS
    • SEARCH BY AUTHOR >
      • A >
        • April Aasheim
        • J.M.M. Adams
        • Heather Ames
        • Frank Arcilesi
        • Stephen Atkins
      • B >
        • Pam Bainbridge-Cowan
        • Barry L. Becker
        • Michael Bershay
        • Kerry Blaisdell
        • D Dean Boom
        • Lori Beasley Bradley
        • Anna Brentwood
        • Andy R. Bunch
      • C >
        • Baer Charlton
        • L B Cheryl
        • Mike Chinakos
        • Kathleen Concannon
        • Jeffrey Cook
        • William J Cook
        • Adam Copeland
        • Pamela Cowan
        • Lisa Cromwell
      • D >
        • Steve DaVala
        • Disa Dawn
        • Sheila Deeth
        • Raven J. Demers
        • Laura Doyle
        • Liam R. W. Doyle
      • E - F - G >
        • Jonathan Eaton
        • Jonathan Michael Erickson
        • Johanna Flynn
        • James L. Gillaspy
        • Thomas Gondolfi
        • Joel Graves
      • H >
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        • Suzanne Hagelin
        • Heidi Hansen
        • Mindy Hardwick
        • Audra Harley
        • Anne Hendren
        • Angela Highland
        • M. P. Hopcroft
        • M. W. Horses
        • A. M. Huff
        • Mollie Hunt
      • I - J - K >
        • Maggie Jaimeson
        • Connie J. Jasperson
        • F. L. Journey
        • Kimila Kay
        • Sheri J. Kennedy
        • Signe Kopps
      • L >
        • Michael R. Lane
        • Katherine Lee
        • Ellie Derrick Lewis
        • Cyn Ley
        • Larry Lindberg
        • Eric Little
        • Maggie Lynch
      • M >
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        • Ramona D. Marek
        • David Martyn
        • tom r. mcconnell
        • Nikki McCormack
        • James M. McCracken
        • Donald McEwing
        • Roslyn McFarland
        • K Z Miller
        • Rory Miller
        • Jeff Monday
        • Sonja S Mongar
        • Barbara J Moritsch
        • Linda B Myers
      • N - O - P >
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        • R. W. Nichelson
        • Tammy Owen
        • Jocelynn Pearl
        • Julie Pershing
        • Nichole Phoenix
        • Courtney Pierce
        • L. Wade Powers
        • E M Prazeman
      • Q - R >
        • Cordelia Rains
        • JMD Reid
        • Shawna Reppert
        • Joyce Reynolds-Ward
        • Ellen King Rice
        • P. K. Ross
        • R Roderick Rowe
      • S - T - U >
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        • Steven C Schneider
        • B. J. Scott
        • James Scott
        • R. G. Shannon
        • Ann Simas
        • Susie Slanina
        • Walt Socha
        • Thomas Stimson
        • Brian Tashima
        • Charles Thomas
        • Patrick Timm
        • Contessa Timmerman
      • V- W- X - Y - Z >
        • Theresa Verboort
        • Cody Voeller
        • Brad Wheeler
        • Steve Zell
        • Gregory E. Zschomler
    • SEARCH BY GENRE >
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      • Children
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      • New Adult Fiction
      • Action & Adventure
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